JIM IS BOSS

moron = morno
moron = moroon
Morons = mormonos
crap = carp
"Hairy Truman said the Buick stops here"
incompetence = incontinence
office = orifice
idiot = idoit
fired = fried
auditor = audiotor
India = Indiana
"customer support in Indiana"
Indians = Indianans
Hoosiers = Hosiers
first = frist
"Stinking outside the box."
Saved = shaved
Spam = spasm
Keyboard = keybroad
Wrapped = warped
Email = emauil
Electricity = eclectircity
Minutes = minuets
Run = ruin (“ruin a department”)
Typewriter = tripewriter
Puerto Rico = Portal Rico
Bars = bras
Cubicle - cubuncle
Type = tripe
Thinking = thicking
Educating = eraducating
Absolutely = obsoletely
Cockroach = crockroach
Lebanese = lesbanese
Mouse = mousse
Message = massage
Tornado = toronado
Band-aid = bad-aid
Peking = Pueking
Late = latte
Good = God
Deposits = desposits
Lots = lost
Executive = execrative
Sledge hammer = sludge hammer
Comments = comets
White-out = wheiat-out
"Unix secrurty gaurds can keep there mnind on there wrok"
Scumbag = scambug
Memorize = mammerize
Stupid = stooped
Reboots = roboots
Morse code = morose code
Carpet = crapet
Sneaker = snaker
Wrapped = warped
Butt = butte
Busy = buzzy
Motherboard = mortarbroad
Standards = satandrads
Paste (as in "cut and paste") = gloo
Social Security = Socialist Security
British = Bruitish
Worms = wroms
Commendation = condemnation
Hamburgers = hamboogers
Lame = lamme
Best = beast
Framed = farmed
Mad Hatter = mud hater
Harassed = herassed
Blow = bowl
Dress = duress
Executive bathroom = execrative bathrmoo
Progressive = porkressive
Union = onion
Cache = cash
Router = rooter
Hell = hall
Switches = swatches
Obvious = oblivious
Network = newtrock
Anarchy = antarky
Genitals = generals
Syphilis = Sisyphus
Doggone = Godgone
Iron ore = irony ore
Reminders = ramainders
Dismiss = smisdiss
SOB = Superme Overlard Boss
Osama Bin Laden = Omaha Bin Louden
Loud = lewd
Obvious = oblivious
out of the box thinking = out of the blox thicking
Dilemma = dilenema
Breakroom = barakroom
Tubes = tubas
Dignity = dingity
Badly = baldly
Dots and dashes = dots and dishes
Ran = rain
Spot = spout
Whine = wine
Great = grate
Bob = boob
Education = erducatution
College = collage
"Selling real estate" = "smellig rael esteat"
Consultant = coslutant
Stop = stomp
Password = passwrod
Mission statement = emission statement
Thanks to The Electronic Avenger for these additions:
sticking -- STINKIG (some things require no comment whatsoever)
development -- DVEVELOPPPMINT
smarta$$ -- SMRATASP
whines -- WINES (this one is a universal translation)
One observation: only in JTB's world is a vice-president PORMOTED to SUPPERVISOR. Just sayin'.

Recommend JIM IS BOSS to your friends!